KK's Special Day

Today was such a special day for our family.  KK chose to be baptized into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  As a family, we have been planning this day for a couple weeks now.  It was a full family effort, thankfully my parents helped with the food (meat and cheese tray, rolls, veggies, and cupcakes).  I couldn't have done it without them, I think just having them there as a support and knowing if I needed more help they would be there helped to relieve some of the potential stress.  

KK brought pictures from home that he wanted to display.  This was the table leading into the chapel where the program was to take place.

These are the gifts that KK gave out as a thank you for coming to the baptism.  This is where I found the printable.   

Here is my handsome ET!  Drinking yogurt...man, he LOVES those things!  

KK received this awesome baptism towel from his Aunt JM.  She was able to use her new sewing machine to embroider his name, date, and the CTR symbol on it.  This was very thoughtful and a very awesome idea!  KK LOVES it!

So here is the infamous before baptism picture, when I took this picture I told them that they looked awkward, so....

 ...I told them they should at least look like they like each other!

 I REALLY LOVE this boy and am so very proud of him.  I can't believe how fast these 8 years have gone!  BTW, the necklace I am wearing is one that KK had made for me!

 I love LOVE my family!  I am so happy to have all of them in my life.  I am very blessed!

 I am so overcome with emotion.  When KK walked into the water font and being placed in the water I started crying a bit.  This was a huge step for him!  He is just growing up way too fast!  I am grateful for the people who came to support him and our family.  We are very blessed to have such a huge church family who loves us!  

Learning Experience

I've been somewhat absent for about a month from blogging.  Times are hard and school is tough.  Life is just busy there's no other way to describe it.  But I do want to blog about a learning experience KK had yesterday.

KK was having a VERY difficult time yesterday.  I picked him up from JM's after my test in peds and he was just really in an off mood.  I figured he was hungry, but before I could feed him I needed to get a perscription filled (that's another story), but once at home I made him some speghetti.  He was acting so helpless that I had to sit him on my lap and fed him the food.  He ate it all up and was very cuddly.  Once Mr H. came home we put on 'Despicable Me' and there's a part where it shows a shark in a floor and KK really wanted to have a floor like that and we posed the question, "what would we feed it!?"  I said we can feed it Zero and all of a sudden he got SO mad and upset at me and went to punch me in my face.  Mr H. grabbed his hand and very firmly pulled KK to look at him and equally firm told him that he doesn't do that to mommy.  It scared KK so badly that he started to wet himself and he cried that he was peeing his pants so Mr H. let him leave but said they were going to have a very serious conversation. 

Once KK was finished, he came back into the TV room and told Mr H. he was ready for the conversation [I was so proud of him acting like a big boy and being responsible for his actions].  Mr H. explained to him that he can't threaten or hit people because he doesn't like what they say.  And he has absolutely reason to do that to mommy.  Mr H. also told him that he needed to apologize to mommy and give me a big hug and KK told him, "Yes, sir!"  He came over to me crying and fell into my arms and said he was sorry.  I just held him and tried to calm him down.  He was very wound up.  KK asked me that if we fed Zero to the shark than wouldn't I miss her!?  Then he started crying hard again.  I explained to him that we love Zero and we would never feed her to the shark and that we were joking around...didn't he know we were joking!?  We're always joking around like that, but I think that he was just very overwhelmed.  I also apologized...I did not know he was going to get so upset cause we're always teasing.

Eventually he was able to calm down.  We decided as a family to go to the movies [Journey 2] but when we got to the theater we realized we didn't have the cash, the theater only accepts cash.  So we chose to go to the bowling alley that is right across the street.  We played 2 games and KK made a strike before either one of us did.  It was neat to see him arranging the bowling balls when they would come out of that bowling ball return machine.

Once home, the bedtime routine started.  After the bath I was lotioning him and I was talking to him about his privates and how no one should touch him there.  I explained to him there are some people, such as doctors, myself, Mimi who could touch to put on medicine but only with his permission.  Well, all of a sudden he started yelling at me again and getting really angry.  Mr H. grabbed him again and very sturnly reminded him of their conversation earlier.  KK started crying again.  I just chalked it up to him being tired, but Mr H. told me that it shouldn't matter if he's tired, he should not talk or act like that towards me. 

We headed to KK's room to read scriptures and say family prayers.  Before the prayer was finished KK was already asleep.  He was so tired.  I continued to lay with him for a while in his bed.  I love him so much.  I know that he can be a handful and there are going to be days where he really hurts my feelings.  But I am still going to love him.  I just hope that yesterday was a learning experince for KK...and myself.

A day with JEM

JEM had a doctor's appointment and is 8 pounds now. Since her doctor is on my side of town JM wanted to hang out. She met us at JoAnn Fabrics. We drove to my house and decided to go swimming. JEM has not gone swimming yet...this was her first experience. I let JM borrow a suit and JEM had a onsie on but before we headed to the pool we had to snap some pictures of the cousins together.

KK's attempt at getting her to smile



The pool didn't phase JEM...it never woke her up! She was just chillin like she did this everyday. While JM and KK played in the pool JEM and I cuddled. But once her chin started to quiver I took her out of the pool and wrapped her in a sun warmed blanket. She was a little uncomfortable until I felt the warm rumble on my palm that was holding her bottom. Yes, she had just pooped in my hand! After that, it was time to go.

Once at home, I made dinner for KK, JM, and myself. KK put in "Little Rascal's" movie and wanted to hold JEM.


After about 5 minutes he told me to take her...he's funny. KK really loves her, he calls her his, "little sister". Anyway, after dinner, JM wanted to take a nap...she's a very tired new mom. So KK, JEM, and I played. This is what we did:
Cuddled with her

Watched her dance. JEM LOVES to Dance

KK was a great helper and wanted to be in the picture too

Watched her ride a horse. She also LOVES to ride horses

On My Mind Lately

G is coming back to Ohio on Saturday. I have a mix of feelings about this...mostly because G is the hardest and most emotionally draining kid I have EVER met! I know he has a better future living with us....but that also means Mr H. and I have some pretty big issues to tackle with him.

My ankle is not feeling better and I am afraid of a fracture. The sucky thing is that we do not have insurance, the boys do, but Mr H. and I don't. Mr H. has access to insurance through his work, but it's $1360/month plus a $5000 deductible on every dependent. We should just set money aside for accidents that may happen. I should talk to Mr H. about doing that...

Mr H. has started flying lessons, as in going up in an airplane and learning how to fly. I am glad that he is happy and I know that he has wanted to do this for a very long time. He's even saved up money for it so we're not tapping into our savings or checking. I just think the timing was off. He has been working on my sister's car, he's going to school, and I hurt my ankle and need help at home more. I don't want to take this away from him but I just think the timing could have been better.

I am very obsessive. I don't like people touching my things and I am very observant. I can tell if people have moved items. I think I may be a little OCD. I know I have CDO (everything of mine is alphabetized) and yes, it makes me go crazy when people do not put things back in the alphabetical order, or any order!

I am nervous about having a sitter for KK when I go back to school in the fall. JM will be moving once she is married. I am afraid RR will get married and move to Utah, and AA is going to school too. I'm just afraid...I don't know what I should do once I don't have a sitter anymore. I guess, the "unknown" makes me nervous.

I want a baby. Well, not RIGHT NOW! I want to finish school and get a good job. But I eventually want to bring a life into this world again. I want to experience a good labor and a healthy natural birth. Maybe, one day!?

Because my ankle is so screwed up I can't clean my house. Once I am down on the floor I can't get back up. I look around the house and all I see is mess, mess, mess. I need help cleaning, but no one is here. I've cleaned both bathrooms, kitchen, and the TV room in 1 week, it took so long. I just want to be healthy again.

KK's dad has not had physical contact with KK since July 4th (he's called him once or twice). It's wearing on KK. He keeps asking if he can go over to his house. When I say that he can't or that he hasn't called me back I know it hurts him. He looks like he is on the verge of tears but tries to hold back. I've even offered to bring KK over, but so far he is too busy to have KK come over or even call KK. It's sad, but what really upsets me is that I am the one who has to pick up KK's broken heart. *To his family who reads this, I do not blame you. He can make up his own mind and right now it's pretty clear what that is. My intention is not to lash out or to be mean. I wrote this because this is something that has been weighing on my mind lately*

I'm sure there are lots more things going on in my head but that's all I can think of...I'm tired and going to bed. Goodnight friends and family.

Happy Birthiversary

Remember when!?

Well, I suppose our family doesn't like to remember a whole lot of dates so we combine important events on days that are already important. Take for instance July 31, last year Mr H. and I tied the knot, it was a special day...this year a healthy and beautiful baby niece was born. Talk about the coolest gift. [Sorry Mr H., I love your gifts...but this kinda out did you! lol].

We woke up to a mass text from JM at 6am that said, "My water just broke!!!" I was too darn tired to get up plus I know that births can take a while [especially first births] so I didn't rush out the door or anything. I took my time waking up. KK and I made french toast for Mr H. I did a load of laundry. I took a shower. I was in constance contact with my parents who were at the hospital. When JM went to the hospital she was already at a 7...but did that make me move any faster?...not really! I got the cameras ready, then realized that the charger was missing [RR "accidently" took it from my house! Just like I'm going to "accidently" punch her face if she does that again!]. I told Dad to let me know when JM has the epidural. In the meantime, AA texted and said she tried waking RP up 3 times to take her to the hospital but he won't budge and asked if I could pick her up on the way. Which we did.

At the hospital we received the update outside the room while JM was resting. The physician went to deliver a set of twins at another hospital and would come back after that so that's why everything was quiet. JM was fully dilated but at a -1 station, she rested while we waited. About an hour after we arrive the nurse went in the room and I followed. I asked JM if she was still alright with me being in the room for the delivery...she didn't care as long as there wasn't a restriction from the hospital on the amount of guests. So I set up post for her right leg. Mom had her left and Z was at the head of her bed looking like he was going to pass out. My other sister, RR was there too just to watch.

JEM was still a little high, but JM started pushing. She made it look so easy, she wasn't straining her face, she was pulling up her legs [while mom and I pushed her legs against her chest to help], and she wasn't screaming or even wincing. Finally JEM started coming down, she would crown but then go back into the canal. Putting my nursing skills to work I was wondering if her bladder was full -- maybe that was why she couldn't come out!? I asked JM if she had to go, she wasn't quite sure because of the epidural and the nurse said that she'd emptied her bladder before they put the epidural in but she would try again. Once the straight cath was in JM filled the basin up half way! Poor JEM was being squished from JM's bladder. After she was empty things started speeding up. The doctor was called in and he just finished suiting up as JEM's head came out. As JEM's head came out JM gave a whimper of pain, but that was the only time. JEM's umbilical cord was wrapped around her shoulder like a purse strap.

JEM
Born: July 31, 2011
At: 2:39pm
Weighing: 6 pounds 10 ounces
Length: 20.5 inches


Z cutting the cord

When she came out she had this very quiet crying. She hated my camera and wouldn't stop crying until she was back with her mom.

Look at her log nails!

Happy Family Photo

Very special moment when JEM was given a Priesthood Blessing

Mr H. was so cute holding JEM, he was a very proud uncle. Doesn't he look like a pro holding her!?

JM did beautifully giving birth. JM made it seem like she did this all the time. She tore a little and was stitched once on either side but everything looked great. I am very proud of JM and I am very grateful that she let me be a part of this very special day. Thank you JM. The easy part is over and done with...now the hard part begins.

Oh, and not to forget...Happy Anniversary Tom! I can't believe it's been one whole year. At times it feels like it was just the other day and sometimes it feels like we've been married longer than a year. And in all actuality we have been married longer than a year, just not to each other. :) We've been through more in one year than a lot of couples have gone through their entire lives. I am grateful to have you as a companion. I am very lucky to have you.

Baby Hungry

I was at Volleyball a couple weeks ago and found out that one of the sisters in the ward was pregnant. A couple weeks after that I noticed that another sister in the ward had a very swollen belly that I had not noticed before. And as you know, my sister, JM, is pregnant and so are both of my sister-in-laws. It seems as though all the women I know are getting pregnant or just had a baby. I am very happy for them and glad that they are adding to their family, but there is a little part of me that is super jealous. Jealous that they are adding to their family, jealous that they get to share the joy of a new life, jealous that, as of now, knowing that we will not have any more children. Mr H. is not interested nor does he want anymore children. This, as you see, has very much crushed my hopes and dreams of one day holding a newborn child of mine in my arms. But this entry isn't going to be about how wrong I think Mr H. is or how can I change his mind. No, I know that Mr H. feels very justified as to what his reasons are and I understand why he feels the way he does. But do I feel ENTIRELY different? Yes. But this isn't the time or place for it. Just knowing that KK might be the only child I have bore has made me treasure the time I have with him. I was looking at old videos of when he was a newborn tonight and it made me sad...knowing that there will be no baby for us. But it also made me smile because he was just so small and cute. Every child is a miracle and a gift from God and in the mean time I can get ready to hold, and smell, and cuddle, and kiss on the future gifts from God that my sister and sisters-in-law are going to have this year.

Check out these videos of a newborn KK

Memorial Weekend

This was a busy weekend so be patient as I ramble on [warning: this is a long post]. Not only is JM still in the hospital (and probably will be until the baby comes) but it's my sister, AA's graduation party.

Friday May 27:
I told KK to get himself dressed in the morning and this is what he picked out

I asked him if he wanted some shorts on because it was hot and he whined and said no, so this is how he looked when we left our house...and no I couldn't touch his socks, that's how he wanted them. When I locked our house up KK told me that "Tweety" was the in water. Remember the bird? Well, Mr H. named him/her Tweety. I looked and looked at the water and did not see the bird anywhere. The bird really camouflaged itself but KK saw it.

And since the bird cannot fly I felt that I should try and help the little guy out of the water hole. I grabbed a Frisbee and a stick and lured him onto the Frisbee and out of the hole he came. KK was so excited that I saved the bird...I was his new hero. It made me feel good. And after rescuing Tweety we drove to meet our family counselor for a session. There are things that she would like me to work on that might help the "G Situation" such as:

Timer Attention: Giving him attention even if I have to set a timer. "Hey I only have 10 mins but I would love to hear about your day..."

Emphasize positive/Minimize negatives: 5 positives for every 1 negative

Earning is much more effective than taking away: Do not focus on taking away, focus on him earning things

Shaping: Working this a little over time. One step in the right direction = praise. Just like a baby learning to run, praise for standing, 1 step, walking, running

Mental Motivators: "I've got Mr H...this will get easier...the only way out is through...I'm training/reteaching

Think about weekly chores instead of daily ones

say "yes" unless you absolutely can't

These may not seem like hard tasks...but these are painful for me to even think about doing. I know I have not talked a lot about "G's situation" but it's something that is THE BIGGEST and most serious stress for our family.

Saturday May 28:
These next pictures are some more of the damage from the storm.


All of the dots on the fence are hits from the hail. In total damage for our house, 3 screens need to be replaced and the shutters, our kitchen skylight, back patio glass and light, and our air conditioner. I'm just glad everyone was safe and no one was harmed.

Bath Time = Mohawk for KK

Sunday May 29:
AA's graduation party was today. She is the last of my 5 siblings to graduate from high school. She was pretty fired up for her party...lots of food, corn hole, and mud wrestling...yes, mud wrestling. AA shared her open house with her friend, Megan, they've been friends since junior high, I think.

I just have to laugh at this photo with RR

Volleyball

KK LOVED the pool



Now trying to splash mom


Peeknut, (A's ball python) made an appearance too!

Too cute not to photo

Mud Wrestling





KK was so upset that dirt was put into the pool and it didn't help when Aunt RR threw him into the dirty water, but Mimi helped him get over it when she gave him the hose with the sprayer on it and he got everyone within a 5ft radius wet!

I even got mud on me from all the splashing and unfortunately I had to toss the shirt because it didn't come out

Today was a great day, A had fun, there was lots of food and company. The only sucky thing about the day was Mr H. had a severe migraine, which I gave him a muscle relaxer for, and he was dead to the world sleeping it off until about 45 mins before we left the party, he was sleeping for a total of 3.5 hours

Monday May 30:
No pictures today. We had a pretty busy day but what made it great was that Mr H. had the day off. G carried the flag at the Memorial Day picnic. We ate great food and played Cornhole, which I beat Mr H. at! KK had a fun time playing and like a mom would, I brought extra drinks for my family, which was a good thing because the water fountain wasn't working and KK was so sweaty. There was also a silent auction for girl's camp. I donated a hand crocheted baby afghan for them to use. I bid on and won 1 night of babysitting, homemade wheat bread, and an FHE treat. Even though we are VERY financially strapped we thought it was a good service project. After the auction, one of our friends from church asked to have G over for the rest of the afternoon, which we gladly accepted. Once we were done baking in the heat we went home and hung out for the rest of the day. Once G came home we spent FHE time swimming in our pool for the first time this year. It was very nice to be a family and have the opportunity to spend the day together. Usually Mr H. leaves for work at 8am and doesn't come home until 9:30pm because of school. So to have the opportunity was such a blessing.